After a two-week hiatus and a Thanksgiving celebration, Saturday Night Live finally returned in the first week of December with a bang. The cold open had to start with War Secretary Pete Hegseth, played by Colin Jost, and Melissa McCarthy’s 6th appearance on SNL, with several skits ahead to up the ante. Four Weekend Updates because the week was news-heavy with the Trump admin messing up a lot. Christmas spirit mixed with holiday chaos and some classic SNL white-woman humor — not family-friendly at all.

Fog of War

Pentagon press conference: Pete Hegseth came in asking “where are the fatties,” an 80-death toll (or another 6–7 reference), drinking problems, “every fisherman… oops every Venezuelan killed,” Matt Gaetz returning with his original jacket, dodging war-crime questions in a “masculine way,” and of course Sleepy Don — Trump dozing off as he flirted with Mamdani in his sleep.

Melissa’s Monologue

She started off by talking about the festive season, its music, and then her odd talent of playing — or rather butchering — the mouth horn with her favorite song. The set was very McCarthy: lights, fake snow, and an audience cheering… maybe a little too much. With a sneaky Epstein reference thrown in.

Goat Cheese

A woman (Melissa McCarthy) doesn’t know how to react when offered a free sample. Melissa, owner of some racist dogs, showed off her great acting skills and her great skill at eating goat cheese — getting a little too comfortable with the tasting guy in a supermarket-style setup, and even getting jealous when other people tried samples.

UPS Driver

A UPS delivery driver (Melissa McCarthy) named Donnda meets with her managers (Mikey Day, Ashley Padilla) to discuss a customer complaint. This leads to a diss at the US Postal Service — a cranky, hateful UPS driver despising customers, taking a leak on their porch, eating the official police complaints, and even causing Mikey to break character as Melissa fake-fainted her way out of the room.

Weekend Update (1)

Colin Jost and Michael Che tackled the week’s biggest news.This brief Weekend Update involved an Asian 7-11 sandwich, the best city for retirees in America, what watching short-form content does to your brain, a bad penis joke, advertising some Star Wars ponchos, and a new train video game.

Weekend Update (2)

Jost and Che went straight for federal government jokes: mocking Trump and his peace prize, his Epstein association with an edited Home Alone 2 clip, MRI tests and a stroke, how the USA will beat Paraguay with the help of ICE, a jab at Hegseth using a Franklin the Turtle poster, and even first lady Melania wasn’t spared.

Weekend Update (3)

Redhead Who Just Went on Vacation (Ben Marshall) stops by to share some tropical travel tips.A sun-burned ginger vacationer trying (and failing) to speak a Jamaican accent, ending up sounding ridiculous. But did he go to Jamaica? No — he went to Ireland. How did he get a sunburn in Ireland? He explains in his own stupid way, all while wearing a bikini top.

Weekend Update (4)

A drunk raccoon (Sarah Sherman) stops by to discuss breaking into a liquor store.A drunk raccoon wreaks havoc on the set, falling multiple times, flirting with host Colin Jost, and going completely feral. Sarah nails the raccoon costume even more than an actual raccoon. A “quiet piggy” joke mocking Trump and eating poop — it was all so bizarre.

Helping Hand

A woman (Melissa McCarthy) gives her neighbor’s son a helping hand.They help each other through thick and thin — bullies and police — in a nice snowy setup, until it becomes very dark at the end.

Moms’ Truth or Dare

A group of moms (Melissa McCarthy, Chloe Fineman, Sarah Sherman, Ashley Padilla, Jane Wickline) play a game of truth or dare.Basically, a white-woman-core truth-or-dare game at a kitty-party-style meetup, where they give sexual dares and ask a little too basic truth questions.

Sunday Supper

A Sunday supper with friends (Melissa McCarthy, Andrew Dismukes, Bowen Yang, Sarah Sherman, Ashley Padilla, Kam Patterson) doesn’t go as planned.The Sunday supper is loved by only one person — Mark — and everybody else is too busy to attend every week, which makes him sad. He even wants to run away from home because no one is excited for Sunday supper like he is. And when Saturday supper gets canceled, Mark starts drinking gasoline.

The Three Musicals

Cousin Planet – an autotune parody-style songMusical guest Dijon performs “HIGHER!” and “Another Baby!” – in a 90s-style urban setup

Christmas Village Report

A local news reporter (Tommy Brennan) interviews a couple (Melissa McCarthy, Bowen Yang) about their extraordinary Christmas village.They show their weird but interesting creations: a Minions-based crib, “Fashion Jesus,” a five-story gingerbread house that’s empty because the gingerbread family was evicted, and a lot of other bizarre ideas.